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|  | | | | | |  | |  | |  | Rebecca Love Nude In The Girl From B.I.K.I.N.I. 42 minutes
, 37 seconds of nude videos
Cult b-movie and sexploitation director Fred Olen Ray (here credited as Nicholas Medina) sets his target on secret agent movies for this parody starring Beverly Lynne as an undercover operative for B.I.K.I.N.I. (The Bureau of International Knowledge and Nonstandard Investigations). Lynne must infultrate a ring of shady, albeit libidinous, types that are trying to interfere with B.I.K.I.N.I.'s ties to the C.I.A. Her journeys have her going up against an oversexed Russian operative ( Gianna Lynn) who captures another, rather busty B.I.K.I.N.I. agent ( Rebecca Love) in her remote castle.
A typically fun and bawdy romp from Ray and his usual gang of misfits and sex-loving crazies, Girl From B.I.K.I.N.I. appears to be bolstered by a slightly higher budget and a pretty humorous "Tit and the Pendulum" joke that goes on so long it gets funny again. Lynne, as always, demonstrates why she gets so much work as not only does she make a fetching, likable leading lady, but she can also act. The more of these movies this team makes, it seems the better the acting and chemistry gets.
Also starring: Lacie Heart and Nicole Sheridan. |
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| | | | | |  | |  | |  | Rebecca Love Nude In Cleavagefield 42 minutes
, 37 seconds of nude videos
Jim Wynorski explores new heights of camcorder-produced softcore with this riff on J.J. Abrams Cloverfield. A Godzilla for the YouTube generation, Cloverfield was another off-shoot of the Blair Witch Project, a first-person narrative in which the person behind the camera participates actively in the proceedings and the resulting recording is actually a document of mysterious events. Considering Wynorski's 2000's resume features three Blair Witch parodies (the Bare Wench series) as well as Survivor Exposed and several "Cabin Movies" like The Witches of Breastwick and Lust Connection, its no surprise he set his sites on a softcore parody such as this. What is surprising is that the moments in between the usual near-hardcore bumping, grinding and posing are actually pretty on target as far as parody goes. While Cleavagefield makes almost no pretense about what it is - the sex and nudie scenes are served up with very little break in the unclothed action - the tone of the picture echoes the original and the scenes involving the CGI monster trampling the back alleys of Burbank are genuinely amusing. Imagine a Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade float based on a Flintstone's dinosaur, and you've basically got the antagonist of this silliness. The movie doesn't stop aping its source by just recreating a few scenes of over-sized mayhem, however, as the dino-monster sheds smaller creatures spreading a libido-expanding virus, and the whole recording (as in Cloverfield) is taped over a previous recording that provides a Hawaiian-based backstory about our cameraman lead. Of course, the backstory this time involves a whole heck of a lot more boobs and is a series of lesbian couplings between two blonde bimbettes: the fetching, enhanced Davina Murphy and her all-natural partner Dallas Lowe.
Dumb? As a stump, yes. But it is called Cleavagefield after all, and it delivers just what the title promises: loads and loads of cleavage from porn and softcore mainstays like Rebecca Love (who is steadily building up her non-hardcore resume thanks to these parody flicks by Wynorski and fellow boobtacular auteur Fred Olen Ray) and Julie K. Smith who shows up late in the flick as a kinky scientist. Perhaps Cleavagefield's best assets are the newer talents on display here. While Lucia Santos doesn't seem all that comfortable with dialogue, she has no problem speaking the universal language of simulated sex whether her partners are male or female (or in one sequence, both at once). Luckily Santos is flanked by newcomers Brandin Rackley (billed as Brandee Schaefer) and Amy Ried who can handle their dialogue well enough and get down and dirty. Rackley is a slightly more filled-out version of Beverly Lynne while Ried is a seriously hot multi-ethnic porn star with a chest that proves to be the most spectacular special effect in the movie.
As usual, the sex scenes are scored to some fairly ridiculous club-tastic porn music - one of them an addictive ear-worm with the repeated refrain of "Pussy Pussy, Bang Bang" - so those who like to actually hear the ambient soundtrack of people getting it on will be, for the most part, disappointed. That said, there's a lot here for fans of breasts, dumb jokes and, well, breasts... so really how can you go wrong? |
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|  | |  | |  | Rebecca Love Nude In The Witches of Breastwick 2 49 minutes
, 52 seconds of nude videos
Among one of the several Wynorski "Cabin Movies" the director put out in the mid-2000's (usually under the pseudonym HR Blueberry), The Witches of Breastwick 2 has at least one throwback to JW's early 2000's run-and-gun productions, The Bare Wench series. Not familiar with Wynorski's career? The cabin movies (including such stellar titles as Lust Connection, The Breastford Wives and the first Witches of Breastwick) all seem to take place in the same comfy-looking California hill country cabin, feature a variety of unusually ample chested softcore and porn stars, and they don't have all that much plot to speak of. OK. They don't have any plot to speak of.
Here, as in the Bare Wench pictures, you get a chocolate sauce interlude as well as the Wynorski special: topless chicks dancing around a campfire. And if you have a problem with that, then you don't have to watch the movie. If the thought of extremely well-endowed women getting all love crazy for one another in hot-tubs could change your mind, our man Wynorski serves up plenty of that too... once with that previously mentioned chocolate sauce.
At this point, the director isn't even trying to tell a story - he just needs to squeeze 8 or so sex and skin scenes in during his 90-minute run time, and here he gives fans of bouncing boobs plenty to salivate over. As if the trio of Taime Hannum, Tylene Buck and Lexi Lamour weren't enough, the b-movie king drops in the staggering human jugtacular known as Rebecca Love, whose one male/female love scene in this flick is shockingly pneumatic for a lady so amply endowed. Still not enough for you? Rounding out the cast list are the hardworking Antonia Dorian (who seems to have a great time in her girl/girl scene with Hannum) and Demi Delia (wife of porn great Randy Spears). Oh yeah... and for reasons thoroughly unclear, it appears Nicole Sheridan took a half hour off from the shoot from Fred Olen Ray's Genie in a String Bikini to show up in this flick, in full genie costume, for a quick and rigorous exchange with lead character David (played by lucky, lucky actor Frankie Cullen). Hell, even genre vet Nikke Fritz shows up near the end of the picture to smash Cullen's face into her rack, so even though she doesn't show off the goods, the dude still gets some play from almost every chick credited. Nice!
Don't expect too much in the way of laughs, thrills, or interest. Do expect lots and lots of full-frontal nudity and faked orgasms that are often, unfortunately, unheard due to Wynorski's Charles Band-like insistence with scoring the sex scenes with music (here the same thumping brand of techno often heard in his flicks.) Still, it's leaps and bounds better than the nudity in the Bare Wench series, so it's got that going for it... which is nice. |
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